Gentlemen, ladies, women.
Here are some tips for you. Trust me, they would have worked on me.
How the Little Things Count
Friday, December 21, 2007
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
repetition
Ever have the realization that you're not the first person to feel or be treated a certain way?
Yeah, I had that happen to me yesterday.
Life's lessons are hard, like REALLY hard.
Where and when do you learn to walk away from something you worked so hard on and cared so much about?
Then you realize for some people, an apology would come too late and they lost out. Big time.
Yeah, I had that happen to me yesterday.
Life's lessons are hard, like REALLY hard.
Where and when do you learn to walk away from something you worked so hard on and cared so much about?
Then you realize for some people, an apology would come too late and they lost out. Big time.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
simple joys of being single
Today I had an epiphany of sorts: a realization of me and my place in the world.
It was a rough start to the weekend. Two let downs and a lonely Saturday, save for a good friend and lunch at the local greasy spoon. Positive affirmations are really the only thing saving me from downing a litre of roasted marshmallow ice cream and a container of cheese.
First things first: simple joys of being single
~peeing with the bathroom door open
~returning to one's house in the same condition one left it
~drinking out of fancy glasses without anyone asking what the special occasion is
~sleeping in the middle of a queen-sized bed
~silence
~watching the Real Housewives of Orange County and not morning cartoons
~my liquor is only being drank by me and I know how much there is at all times
~the shoe rack is full of my shoes, and my shoes only
This is a start, there are more, but I'll start small.
But now onto my epiphany. As I mentioned before it has been a rough weekend. Tears have flowed quite easily but I'm grateful for my friends that have supported me and my decision to make a huge leap for my own happiness. (You have to think about yourself.)
I am amazing. I have traveled (somewhat) extensively on my own through Europe. I have a job, no, a career and a future at a fabulous company. I am a very open person to talk to, especially about gender and sex (I may even know TOO much - if that's possible.) I have ambition, drive, motivation, dreams, goals and a plan. I go to school part-time on top of my full-time job and just got 97% in my class. My friends are fantastic and supportive. I've got an amazing family that supports me 110% in my decisions. I deserve the best.
Drumroll for the epiphony:
It's not what's wrong with me that is the question. I will no longer ask what I did because I've cried enough over that. The only thing I did wrong was care and try hard when I wasn't reciprocated and I deserve better. I deserve the best.
It was a rough start to the weekend. Two let downs and a lonely Saturday, save for a good friend and lunch at the local greasy spoon. Positive affirmations are really the only thing saving me from downing a litre of roasted marshmallow ice cream and a container of cheese.
First things first: simple joys of being single
~peeing with the bathroom door open
~returning to one's house in the same condition one left it
~drinking out of fancy glasses without anyone asking what the special occasion is
~sleeping in the middle of a queen-sized bed
~silence
~watching the Real Housewives of Orange County and not morning cartoons
~my liquor is only being drank by me and I know how much there is at all times
~the shoe rack is full of my shoes, and my shoes only
This is a start, there are more, but I'll start small.
But now onto my epiphany. As I mentioned before it has been a rough weekend. Tears have flowed quite easily but I'm grateful for my friends that have supported me and my decision to make a huge leap for my own happiness. (You have to think about yourself.)
I am amazing. I have traveled (somewhat) extensively on my own through Europe. I have a job, no, a career and a future at a fabulous company. I am a very open person to talk to, especially about gender and sex (I may even know TOO much - if that's possible.) I have ambition, drive, motivation, dreams, goals and a plan. I go to school part-time on top of my full-time job and just got 97% in my class. My friends are fantastic and supportive. I've got an amazing family that supports me 110% in my decisions. I deserve the best.
Drumroll for the epiphony:
It's not what's wrong with me that is the question. I will no longer ask what I did because I've cried enough over that. The only thing I did wrong was care and try hard when I wasn't reciprocated and I deserve better. I deserve the best.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
joys of apartment living
Laundry night.
Where I used to live I had 24/7 access to the laundry room (both washer and dryer).
Now I have to pay to do my laundry and wait for others to complete their's. One person has a duvet that smelled of cat pee - oh joy, yummy.
Tonight I ran into a woman that I used to work with at a job I left almost 2.5 years ago. Yeah, you never know who you're going to run into in the laundry room. And no, the duvet wasn't hers.
Back to Christmas cards. What an exciting life I lead.
Where I used to live I had 24/7 access to the laundry room (both washer and dryer).
Now I have to pay to do my laundry and wait for others to complete their's. One person has a duvet that smelled of cat pee - oh joy, yummy.
Tonight I ran into a woman that I used to work with at a job I left almost 2.5 years ago. Yeah, you never know who you're going to run into in the laundry room. And no, the duvet wasn't hers.
Back to Christmas cards. What an exciting life I lead.
Monday, December 10, 2007
Sunday, December 9, 2007
sophisticated lady
Oh Ella, how I love your tunes. Your voice echoes throughout me.
Yesterday was a difficult day. Moving was rough and I felt useless as my back has been really sore recently and I can't lift anything too heavy or bend over certain ways. But good friends came through and helped me a tonne. I don't know what I would have done without them or my family.
This morning I awoke in my new apartment to white stuff on the ground - SNOW! I wasn't expecting it at all. Luckily it didn't stick to the ground or roads.
My house is starting to come together. One picture is up on the walls and my books are in my bookcase, plus I've used my dishwasher 3 times in about 24 hours.
Moving from a house to an apartment is extremely challenging; everything you kept for those 'just in case' situations really needs to be tossed.
I was told the other day that someone thought I was a home-body. Am I really? I don't think so. I like going out, with friends, family, etc. However there are certain places where I do not enjoy going: bars where all you do is stand around and drink or go in the smoke room. I loathe smoking, it makes me ill and gives me headaches (plus it'll kill you) so I guess not liking certain places has meant that I am a homebody to some.
But perhaps I have changed in the past year. I realize it. I used to go out and see a lot of people that I rarely talk to now. Simply put, I don't like who I've become. I want to go back to having fun AND being responsible because I think we can have both, you just have to be conscious. But I refuse to go places that I do not feel comfortable.
Rules of existance (version 1):
-don't be afraid to ask questions, you never know what they may lead to
-do not give up the right to be happy
And we'll continue more later.
Yesterday was a difficult day. Moving was rough and I felt useless as my back has been really sore recently and I can't lift anything too heavy or bend over certain ways. But good friends came through and helped me a tonne. I don't know what I would have done without them or my family.
This morning I awoke in my new apartment to white stuff on the ground - SNOW! I wasn't expecting it at all. Luckily it didn't stick to the ground or roads.
My house is starting to come together. One picture is up on the walls and my books are in my bookcase, plus I've used my dishwasher 3 times in about 24 hours.
Moving from a house to an apartment is extremely challenging; everything you kept for those 'just in case' situations really needs to be tossed.
I was told the other day that someone thought I was a home-body. Am I really? I don't think so. I like going out, with friends, family, etc. However there are certain places where I do not enjoy going: bars where all you do is stand around and drink or go in the smoke room. I loathe smoking, it makes me ill and gives me headaches (plus it'll kill you) so I guess not liking certain places has meant that I am a homebody to some.
But perhaps I have changed in the past year. I realize it. I used to go out and see a lot of people that I rarely talk to now. Simply put, I don't like who I've become. I want to go back to having fun AND being responsible because I think we can have both, you just have to be conscious. But I refuse to go places that I do not feel comfortable.
Rules of existance (version 1):
-don't be afraid to ask questions, you never know what they may lead to
-do not give up the right to be happy
And we'll continue more later.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
countdown to the beginning
About this time last year I was in LALA land. I was being picked up from my Christmas party, swooned, adored, called. Now I'm packing up my life from the past 2 years at the Rainbow Palace and moving on. It's rather amazing how things have changed.
Today was my final exam for my class and I couldn't be happier. This week is high stress. Moving, packing, school, meetings, new home. I can't wait until Sunday morning. I want to shop for Christmas presents, decorate my house and bake. Something I haven't been able to do because it just means I have more stuff to pack up.
It's been really difficult coming home every night to an empty, dark house. Packing and cleaning everything myself then going to bed in an empty bed. It's strange what you get used to.
Tonight I got home, made dinner and put on Casino Royale. Everyone needs a little eye-candy to take their mind off of things. To feel attracted to someone. Perhaps even feel sexy, something I haven't been feeling lately. Rather, I've felt rejected and ignored. But I know this will change soon enough.
I've actually felt guilty of knowing what I wanting and having the gumption to actually state what I want and need in my life. I refuse to feel that way again.
I'm tough, I'm ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay. ~Madonna
I think, therefore I'm single. ~Lizz Winstead
Finally, I leave you with:
The stupidest mistake in life is thinking the one who hurt you the most, won't hurt you again.
oh, and this hot studd:
Today was my final exam for my class and I couldn't be happier. This week is high stress. Moving, packing, school, meetings, new home. I can't wait until Sunday morning. I want to shop for Christmas presents, decorate my house and bake. Something I haven't been able to do because it just means I have more stuff to pack up.
It's been really difficult coming home every night to an empty, dark house. Packing and cleaning everything myself then going to bed in an empty bed. It's strange what you get used to.
Tonight I got home, made dinner and put on Casino Royale. Everyone needs a little eye-candy to take their mind off of things. To feel attracted to someone. Perhaps even feel sexy, something I haven't been feeling lately. Rather, I've felt rejected and ignored. But I know this will change soon enough.
I've actually felt guilty of knowing what I wanting and having the gumption to actually state what I want and need in my life. I refuse to feel that way again.
I'm tough, I'm ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay. ~Madonna
I think, therefore I'm single. ~Lizz Winstead
Finally, I leave you with:
The stupidest mistake in life is thinking the one who hurt you the most, won't hurt you again.
oh, and this hot studd:
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